A Balancing Act, Two Sisters Dream Interpretation

The reason I’m thinking about Mary and Martha is because in a recent dream I was present with another woman who seems very much a Martha-type figure to me. She is always there, always helpful, has all the details at her fingertips. It's a good way to be. But when I say 'Martha' I mean the Martha in the Bible that complained that her sister was not helping get dinner ready. In the dream, I and the other woman were both sitting at the feet of a respected person who said to us, ‘My beautiful ladies.’ It was said in a very kind and appreciative way. It reminded me immediately of the biblical story of Mary the listener and Martha the worker-bee.

Martha, the Worker Bee

Now I’m a big fan of worker-bee’s –  it’s alot of work making the world turn. Martha is absolutely part of daily living, but not everything we can be. In this story Mary and Martha are conveniently divided between two separate people, but I think both Mary and Martha live in us. Both are valued and beautiful, both sustain us. But let's not play favorites. They balance and complement one another. It's a Christian yin and yang thing, requiring balance of energy and effort.



A Busy Bee

Martha, if you remember, was very concerned about her guest. She was buried in the preparations and her sister wouldn’t help! Her sister, Mary, was content to listen and enjoy the company. Jesus said she chose the better part. How often do we miss the fun, enjoyment and opportunity to learn because we want things to be perfect? We plan, work and schedule ourselves to success. It makes us tired, cranky and jealous of others.

Seeking Out Mary

But what about when we find ourselves confused, anxious, empty? That is when we need to tap into our inner Mary, the one who listens attentively for hours on end, and focuses on the bigger spiritual picture, tuning out all distractions. That means carving out some time - whether it means leaving a  things undone, declining invitations, or getting up early.

How else can we balance out Martha, except with Mary? We weren’t created just to work and get a lot done. We are created to find God, learn to follow the Spirit, find and live out our own callings. Letting go of the activities and busy-ness can seem selfish or impractical. And maybe the people around us don't get it. I like to explain that I need time out. But instead of it being a punishment, it’s the time I cherish the most.

Time Out to do What?

Meditate, listen, pray

Paint or draw

Interpret your dreams

Walk and enjoy nature

Think a little (not too much)

Read on an interesting subject or person
Just be myself

Other things that renew your spirit

The time we spend with ourselves is time for renewal, change, learning, and listing to life's messages. It can be a source of strength and bring a renewal of faith, or the courage to change our lives. It really is the better choice.

It's a little like the two women in 'Beaches,' a friendship of balance and beauty. Only we have both those personalities within us all and they both need encouragement and space to grow.

 

You are the Wind Beneath My Wings

 

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Simple Meditation

I always swore I'd never be the kind of person who gets so lost in their job, family and responsibilities that I'd lose track of myself. But you know what? I did. It is so easy to do.

When my kids were small, I remember clearly having a couple of hours free and not even knowing what to do with the time. When I asked myself, what I (me, myself, Ruth) wanted to do, I had no idea because it had been so long since I had any time for myself. I remember realizing that was maybe a problem.

Did I do anything about it? No, I just keep going on the treadmill, for years and years.

It was several years later, when both my parents passed away that I realized I had really no way to handle it. I was so detached from myself, my emotions, my thoughts, that I had no idea what to do with these very hard and painful events.

That is when I really had to stop.

Because at that point I knew (like really knew) that getting my kids clothes, cooking a nice dinner or getting a raise were not going to help at all. I was about 10-12 years behind on dealing with my own stuff and couldn't go on that way. The pain was too much.

So I stopped a lot of stuff to let some space into my life, just for me, just because I needed it.

I really don't want to preach - but I think I'm not unusual. So, I'll go out on a limb and say - Hey maybe you need some space too.

Are you frazzled? Do you think it really needs to get better soon? Do you want a few more hours? Do you yell at your kids and husband more than you should? Yes, Yes, Yes!

I feel that way all the time and I've found that meditation really helps. There are a few things that meditation really helps with:

• slowing down the pace of the heart and breathing when stress hits me
• putting myself in a place to understand my dreams better
• create time to feel who and what I am
• reach out to God and feel his presence

One of the very best ways that I've found to do that is meditation and I wish I'd discovered it sooner. It's better than almost any other thing I've tried, so I'll share my very simple method.

Just a Few Easy Steps

Sit somewhere comfortable and quiet. I'm not a stickler for correct posture, finger postures, eyes open or closed. Just sit and focus on your breath in and out.

1. Breath in to a slow count to 7.   1..2..3..4..5..6..7. When you start, I can usually count to 4 before I need to inhale or exhale. That's a sympton of my stress level. But after a few breathes in and out I find that I count to 4, then I don't need to inhale right away, so I just let myself breath when my lungs want to, so now I"m at 5 or 6, and I just keep relaxing and breathing until I'm at 7 in and 7 out.
2. Take your mind off the breathing and visualize something you find beautiful, the sea, a flower, or listen to relaxing music.
3. If you find that you are back worrying or stressing over some problem or situation, or what you need to do next, just say 'I'm not going to think about that now.' Keep pushing those reminders of what you should be doing out of your mind and go back to your flower, or sunlight.
4. Other things - let you mind wander over to the fact that you are at peace, your spirit is at peace, you are in the presence of God.
5. Sometimes I actually feel that I've gone to a different place, there is almost a click, or a change in the light as if shifting back from the world into myself. That is the place I'm trying to get to.

Spend as long as you want. I find 20-30 minutes in meditation is very relaxing and settling. It also can put me in a frame of mind to consider and mull over dream messages. Different associations will often form in my mind as I mediate or after meditation that helps me uncover dream meanings.

Enjoy your meditation time and it will help you enjoy your whole day. I promise!

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Change is Good - Three's, Shamrocks, Delta's

If we believe that life is the journey and not the destination, then we can always be looking for the next step, or in reality what we think of as 'change.' To tell the truth, I have a love/hate relationship with change. Sometimes I desperately yearn for change, and sometimes changes that drop suddenly into my life are very unwelcome!

Hopefully as we get older and wiser we realize that even the unwelcome changes often bring unexpected benefits, lovely new people, growth in ourselves, cultivation of new abilities. Is it all good then? Well, I can't honestly say that it is, but it is what it is, right? We move with the flow and try to navigate in the direction we think would be best. Mostly that works out ok.

Change

One of the most common themes in my dream is 'Change.' Change of attitude, change of place, change in relationships, change in plans, change in family life. I find that the number three is associated many times with Change dreams. I might have three dreams in a row with the same theme, or three people (myself and two others), or even shamrocks.

Shamrocks and Clovers




Three leafed clovers

Now, if you are familiar with St. Patrick, you will know the shamrock as the symbol that St. Patrick used to explain the trinity to the Irish people that he worked among as a Christian missionary. In that context, the leaves represent the three aspects or faces of God, the Father, Son and Holy Spirit, as well as the unity of the three. So, the shamrock or three leaf clover can symbolize aspects of unity, difference, and interconnectness of concepts, or values too. But, I also find that three leaves can related to the Delta, or three message of change. If my dream contains a field of clover or shamrocks, or any kind of three, I look for both interconnectedness and change messages.

Do I need to change, grow, explore, open my heart, go to another level?

Three, Triangle, Delta



Oil Change note to Self

Somewhere in my math education I learned to use the Greek symbol of the triangle, the Delta, to represent the difference between A and B. 'The Delta'  is often used in the business world too and I use it all the time in my personal shorthand. It is a perfect shorthand for the difference, or distance between point A (where I am now) and point B (where I am going next).

So, do I actually see the triangle? Actually no, rather there will be 3 of something. Then working through the dream's theme and purpose, I will find it is point to some aspect of myself that might need a serious refresh, and the 3 will be an underlying hint that I need to start changing in tune with the dream.

Learning Life's Lessons Through Dreams

Often, I wonder, am I done with this theme yet? have a changed enough? am I there yet? should I focus on other areas? Change dreams often answer that question pointing out more change on the current learning theme or moving on to another lesson in life.

In her book The Dream Book, Betty Bethards says our dreams are like lessons in school and our waking life is where we do our homework. Sometimes the work is slow, sometimes it goes quickly. Our dreams let us know when we are done. <Link>

Except we are not ever done, not ever there, are we? I still haven't found what I'm looking for.

"I still haven't found what I'm looking for" by U2 + Gospel Choir

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I’ll be your Silver, I’ll be your Gold

When I see silver things, no matter what they are, I know them to be beautiful, precious, brilliant, luminous, and strong. Silver in dreams can refer to our eternal soul, our spirit, precious relationships, or loved ones. It is a very important color and material, really signaling important messages pertaining to our life journey and wellbeing.
 

Friendship and Love

Silver, gold and other metals can often represent the value we place in our relationships with those we hold dear. Isn’t love silver? Isn’t it gold? Twenty fifth wedding anniversaries are called Silver Anniversaries, and the 50^th wedding anniversary is called Gold, strong, valuable, and enduring.

            ' I’ll be your platinum, I’ll be your silver, I’ll be your gold'

             Justin Bieber, As Long as You Love Me


Silver and gold can also be the colors of friendship, as in the old song
 

Make new friends, but keep the old.

             One is silver and the other’s gold.

Silver Chains

Silver chains can represent our precious and fragile links to people we love. The silver chain links us to each of our loved one, little connections to one another. Are the chains heavy or light? Is it  necklace or restraint? Hopefully, they are light and beautiful, and we wear them with pride.

Silver Chains - of the Heart?

 

'My love is an anchor tied to you, tied with a silver chain'

Southern Cross, Crosby, Stills and Nash

 What about Silver Coins?

What about an old silver coin? An old coin like a silver dollar, can be precious because of its historical value, its pure silver content, or its unique place in history. Because it is rounded, it can represent perfect wholeness, the search for wholeness, the completion of a stage of learning. Maybe it is something with lasting value that you should keep, and not trade easily for something newer.

 

Silver coins and pennies can also be an offering or a wish, like coins thrown in a fountain. They may represent either hopes or dreams, or possibly past remembrances.

Change

You might find yourself sorting change (coins) or trying to make change with coins in a dream. This can often be a symbol for making changes in our lives. Sometimes we need to take the initiate and be decisive. That message can be delivered by the conversion of money or coins. In your dream if you cannot make proper change, are trying to pay too much, or no one can break a large bill, you might be having some trouble making needed changes in your waking life. Been there!

Silver Cask or container

A floating silver container is of the air, or the Spirit. It can represent the spiritual forces, or angels, that are with you, though you may not be aware of them. If it is behind you, it may be that there is a spiritual force behind the events in your life, whether a guardian angel, God, or a higher power.

 Silver Keys and Charms

Silver keys are for unlocking spiritual or eternal truths and allowing you to move forward. Silver keys on a chain or belt show you that you are the keeper of the keys. You have access to whatever you need - any room, anything stored away, any treasure.

 

 Silver Charms

When little silver charms appear, you might pay attention to your blessings, good fortune, remembrances, maybe even luck, as in lucky charms.

 
I hope your dreams are filled with silver – whether it means love, the Spirit working, or changes. They are all good.

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Shot Through the Heart - Who's to Blame?

Seeing or experiencing gunfire in a dream certainly catches my attention. It is so completely foreign to my world that it really startles me and I can't help but take a very close look at that dream. Two times, I've had this imagery come into my dream world - both times, it was important.

The Warning Shot

In this first dream, I was driving and noticed I was pursued by a woman in a vehicle. I pulled my car over to talk to her. She got out of her car and started firing gun at me! In the dream I was shocked.

At first I focused on the shooter but that was a dead end. She did not remind me of anyone I know, and she had not striking characteristics. I spent some time thinking about whether anyone I knew had reason to be offended. That did not lead anywhere either.

Then I realized anything can happen in a dream. So, if she were firing at me and missed, then she wasn't shooting to kill. I was not actually in danger so it must be a warning shot! As it turned out, my dream was issuing a ‘wake-up’ call that I was in danger or putting myself into a dangerous situation and I needed to realize it and change direction, like right now.

Shot in the Back

The Warning Shot dream was in sharp contrast to a later dream involving a shooting. In the second dream, a cousin of mine was shot at the mall unexpectedly. He was weak and sank to the ground, leaning against a wall. When I put my arm around him, I found the back of his jacket was soaked in blood where he had been shot in the back. 

So here was my cousin (me probably) experiencing pain, weakness, and fainting from blood loss. Because he had been shot in the back he did not see it coming. This speaks to an unexpected, shocking injury which I was not prepared for. Dream emotions come from true feelings that spill over from our waking lives into the dream life, as we try and cope with them.

The song that comes to mind is ‘Shot Though the Heart’ by Bon Jovi, but with a twist.



A Broken Heart

 

What to do? What to learn?

 

In the dream, I embraced the wounded person, myself. It is so important to acknowledge how we actually feel. It is a very simple gift we can give ourselves. I think it is so unhelpful to deny pain or suffering, or to blame ourselves for it. Yet, how many times to we say ... I should have known better.  I should have expected this. I deserve this.?

Instead, could we be a friend? Offer some support? Give ourselves a kind word? Still love ourselves and confirm our own value and goodness?

How many times was Jesus betrayed and wounded by his friends - Peter, Judas, all the silent onlookers? And did he say - I should have expected this. I should have known. Why did I love them so much? That would have been very human and very typical. But he knew his friends and knows us now - that is what makes his actions and example so amazing.

Can I be so forgiving? Forget to count up the wrongs? I'm not sure. But in the face of disappointments and unkind words and actions, I can give myself that hug. Maybe I can forget to keep score because I know God understands all of it.

What to do with Suffering?

And I wonder if there is a purpose in the pain? I think the answer is yes. Just two final thoughts from two women who inspire me.

My mother would say, 'Offer it up.'

And Sree Chakravarti says, 'Then I remember that pain is the hammer of God which chisels us into greatness.'



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